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    March 19

         缘,这个字我的理解就是一个人遇上一件事或遇上一个人几率等于100%的情况。所以说马路上相撞的汽车们也算是有缘了。缘这个东西我等了很久了,为了和一个我爱的人在一起的缘。但是在一起了又怎么样那?缘,是个很容易变的东西,以后在街上与谁谁擦肩而过的时候,缘就没了。最近了了我一装心愿,还算是心里好受了一些,我想我是不是也应该出家啊?不知道我与佛祖有缘没啊。我的心有变的很静很静了,没有了那些日子的冲动,和我以前有一阵的心理一样了。我又把我接触的东西看的很淡很淡,人比缘更善变的,我常常在变,我喜欢现在这种心境的我,没有以往的急噪,以往的狂妄,以往的不安,以往的骄傲。。。。什么是我渴望得到的?没有了。。。。我现在真的很想去深山密林,找一片竹林,自己搭一个小竹屋,旁边有几个幽雅和善良的邻居,在里家不远处有一个瀑布,瀑布底下是深潭,可以在小河那里掉到鱼,山上有一座寺庙,如果寂寞了,还可以去离家六七里地的小镇上去喝酒,逛集市,过年过节的看看烟花,划划船,在没人的地方放声高歌。。。。以后怎么样再说,现在比较向往古时隐士的生活了,远离这个喧闹,没有太多人情的地方,这里有的是背叛,是欺骗,是人们的惶恐和彷徨,无所谓了,爱怎么着怎么着吧,反正我不去理会这些了,我想抛掉一切一切,一切烦恼,一切压力,一切欲望,一切理想,一切牵挂,一切我恨的我爱的。。。。我想让我的灵魂能够飞出我的身体,我想在空中看着我的身体,我想飘到远方。。。。

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